Hi All. Today wasn't actually a wonderful day, but I am ok - no worries.
I didn't fall asleep last night until 3:30am because my neighbor in my apartment was being really loud. So, I woke up exhausted. I packed a breakfast and a lunch so that was positive. I got to work and found out that some of my coworkers are leaving the company. Everything seems like it is changing really fast in my work world. By lunch time, I was sick of being at work. It was so hard to be back and I couldn't stop yawning. So, after I ate my lunch, I went to work from home for the afternoon. That didn't go well. I kept falling asleep but was able to wake myself up to check my work email every now and then. It was pretty unproductive. So, now I am worried that I am not going to be able to sleep tonight again because the napping. Oh no. That would be horrible. After I woke up from my nap(s), I watched tv and ordered Chinese food which wasn't good. I thought about just eating a frozen meal (thats all I have in my apartment) but got worried that it wasn't going to be enough food and that I would feel hungry all night (the worst feeling). So, I ate a lot, feel guilty about it, and feel kinda lonely now because I have been in my apartment alone since 1 pm today. I guess I did this all to myself though.
Tomorrow, I will make my breakfast and lunch again and get back with the program, make plans, and not sit around. That is so hard sometimes.
Unfortunately I am just a lazy person. I have always been this way. I would much rather watch TV and read a book than go out sometimes. I love sleeping and naps. A lot of my lack of energy probably has to do with my weight, right?
I would like to begin starting to work out (again) but I hate it. I just really do. Every time I try to make a workout routine, I stick with it for a few days and then quit because I hate it. I also hate that I do it ONLY for weight purposes and not for health at all. I just can't go to the gym and not think about my body image and weight. It just never feels like a positive experience... the skinny people, the big mirrors, the jiggling fat...
I thought about working out tonight actually, but then I thought about how much I ate for dinner. Instead of thinking "I can go work this off," I thought "whatever...I've ruined the night anyway." I kept thinking that there was no point in working out if I had already eaten badly. There I go with my black-or-white thinking again.
So, my question for you is HOW CAN I GET MYSELF TO WORK OUT AND STOP BEING LAZY? Do you work out in the morning or evening? How do you get yourself there? What type of workout do you do? How do you fit it in your work schedule? HELP! I need major advice.