Wallowing

I have been in bed since last night at this time. Last night i got into an argument with my dad about recovery. He basically said "just do it." As if it were that easy.. So, I stormed out of dinner, binged, took two Advil PM and have been in bed ever since.. I didn't go to meetings today or my haircut. I also was supposed to go to dinner tonight with my friends but cancelled. I am depressed and really just want to wallow in my sadness for a while.. Is that so bad?

I am tired of trying/ having good intentions. It was nice to have this day to sleep and be antisocial.

And I know I am going to binge tonight... But I don't really care! It's so exausting feeling guilty so much.